Russia’s reverse reverse reverse reverse psychology on the Election

Pluto isn’t a planet but Russia is. Or atleast, Russia has such a gravitational pull on our election that you’d say its a planet. Before you take to Twitter on your Commie Crusade saying “RUSSIA HACKED TEACHER TEACHER RUSSIA IS CHEATING CALL THE POLICE OH WAIT THIS IS CHICAGO.” Hacktually, that is not what I said. Russia hacked our election by not hacking it.

THE PSYCHOLOGY:

Russia wants Trump. Therefore they must rig the election by conventional everyday means. You know, HACKING KGB INTERFERENCE DRESSING UP AS THE RED SCARE FOR HALLOWEEN.

THE REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY:

‘Murica knows this so they installed antivirus or they don’t play on Russian Fortnite servers or whatever 8.5 billion dollars in cybersecurity gets you. Also, the Feminist Boys Institution or FBI or whatever the acronymn stands for has measures tighter than a fat guy’s belt. If Russia go hacky, FBI go smacky.

THE REVERSE REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY:

Russia knows this so they will not hack the election thus making the American public more even more anxious and paranoid because the FBI has not found the nonexistent Russian hackers. Its a game of Hide and Seek and Seek and Seek and Seek oh wait I’m hallucinating there was no Hider.

THE REVERSE REVERSE REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY:

At this point, Russia has hacked the election. Not with toasters and Xboxes, but with psychology. The American people will think that Russia has hacked the election, but cannot take physical action due to no evidence being present despite political parties in the United States being able to change election results by blaming the change in results on the Russians which never happened.

THE REVERSE REVERSE REVERSE REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY:

At this point in the tutorial, your country should suffer from famine and a dictatorship. If not, go back to step 1 and choose Russia. Either way, the American people do the hacking for you by you being the people who do the hacking by not hacking. Wait, what the hack am I talking about? I GOTTA MAKE LIKE A PRISONER AND FIND MY WAY TO THE EXIT.