How George Washington got stuck on the Dollar bill

Roses are red, but money is green

It was now time for Washington to come clean

He crossed the Delaware

But he also crossed the line

Which is why he’s now on the dollar bill

Which is used to pay a fine

When Hamilton gave him the money from his Broadway Play

He spent it on a disco ball for the Boston Tea Party (Pronounced Part-ay)

King George wanted his head, but not just a wax figure

Washington’s bounty just kept getting bigger

He needed a disguise, a façade you might call it

So he decided to hide

Inside King George’s wallet



It looks as if the Founding Fathers put their kid up for adoption… America that is. America will become like my milk, half and half.

Oh say Kenya sea?

Canada gets in for free

Mexico, we say Mexino

Amputees don’t have the right to bear arms

Thank you, thank you. I will now proceed to resurrect Stalin so that we can have a sane president.



Mibe Ut Hertz

FBI head of telemarketing. No need to wear a nametag, I already know your name. I don’t “meet in the middle” unless that means six feet apart.